Monday, October 3, 2011

Happy Take Your Clothes Off Day

As the cotton cobwebs and ironically happy ghosts begin to spring up among the residential neighborhoods surrounding my religious university in my happy, little town, students' spidey senses are tingling: Hallow's Eve is but just around the corner!

Particularly from the female population, "What are you going to be for Halloween?" Is now the new standard question you ask your gal friends/classmates/acquaintances/girl(s)-randomly-in-your-dorm-room.

I've begun to explore the intention behind the question. Are you all being polite and making conversation with what is seasonally at hand? Are you trying to gain an edge on what everyone else is being so you can decide juuust before the holiday in order to have the BEST COSTUMER EVER?! OR. Are you gauging your female counterpart's answer on the slutty meter? For me, that's been a point of interest as of late: this whole promiscuous costume ritual that begins somewhere between being awkward in high school and masking that awkward with exposed flesh in college.

Back in High School (look at me I'm so old) I always made a point to make some sort of ironic statement come Halloween time because that was the kind of pretentious radical I was. My first Halloween with cancer as a sophomore I was Goldilocks....get it?? BECAUSE I WAS BALD. Jesus I crack myself up. Come junior year, I was just barely declared 'on the road to recovery' and dressed as a doctor. Good one, high school Me.

I recall even back then girls used the holiday as an excuse to show a little skin; as Mean Girls so beautifully lays out plain an' simple.

I used to be so adamantly against the assumed fleshy shit-show come every October but I've recently thought about the holiday a bit more in-depth.

Is dressing scantily for a holiday not what's been shoved down our throats as females since we were but wee lasses? Look what happened to Cady! She wore a really well thought out, modest costume and she was considered the #uglygirlattheball. I'm not saying that whatever the media tells us is absolutely valid, but it gives a pretty hearty excuse as to why young women dress the way they do on Halloween. I think the outfits of choice are a statement of American culture. This is just what we do; this is our ritual once we come of age (hopefully).

And I full-heartedly believe that intention is everything. Girls are taught that if they put on a low-cut blouse they're a slut. Well. If a girl puts on a low-cut blouse with the intention of being looked at like a sex symbol and hoping for 0 eye-contact from the men in the room, then yeah maybe that statement holds true. But if a lady wears a dress that shows a little curvage with the intention of celebrating her femininity then YOU GO OUT THERE AND CELEBRATE!

 Yeah, a good amount of my wardrobe could be mistaken for little boy clothing, and yeah I'm super into the whole baggy trend, but occasionally (upon interacting with larger masses of college students in say a "recreational setting") I'll swap my baggy shirt for a little dress or torn "boyfriend-styled" jeans for a little skirt so I can say: BAM! I'm not just moderately quirky and happen to be well spoken and read-I can be cute too sometimes! I get it ladies, I get it.

So attention females of America! I was wrong in being a judgmental beezy every Halloween and I ha-pologize. Go into that Halloween party and you show that skin! But show yo goodies knowing that you are a smart, talented, special, snowflake of a girl who deserves respect despite the mouse ears.  

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